Sometimes when we are trying our best to move forward, something blocks us
Sometimes when we are trying our best to move forward, something comes along to block us. Here are ten tips to help you keep moving in the right direction.
Get out of the house or office. If you can’t get your mind clear, sometimes stepping outside can give you a new perspective. Getting some fresh air will enliven your senses, and your brain will start to think of new things.
Start writing. Turn on your computer, or get out a pad and paper and write down whatever is in your head. Once you’ve cleared out most of the extemporaneous thoughts, the ones you want will appear.
Work on a different project. If you can’t do what’s immediately in front of you, find something else to occupy your thoughts and energy. It doesn’t really matter what it is; you are taking this action to clear your mind by temporarily putting aside whatever you’re stuck on.
Clean your desk. Sometimes we have so many irons in the fire that we can get bogged down with what to do first. As you clean your desk, not only will you break a pattern of inactivity but you will find things that you’ve already completed and can put away. Doing so will give you some more room to process your thoughts.
Take a deep breath. You would be surprised at how many people hold their breath when they feel tense. When you cut off the oxygen supply from your brain and body, you can’t function as well. Breathing deeply a few times can reenergize you and give you that little extra bit of clarity that you need.
Take a shower. Even if it’s the middle of your day, a shower can change your perspective and help you get going. We all feel better when we get clean, and though it seems like a small step, it may be just the trick you need to get back on a positive path.
Call a good friend. Hearing the voice of someone you care about and spending a few minutes getting involved in his or her world can give you a new outlook on yours. Making this positive emotional connection may be just what you need to get moving again.
Move your body. Dance, get up and walk around the room, pick up your clothes, or do some exercise. Get those endorphins circulating through your brain. Being sedentary retards your ability to come up with new ideas.
Read. Someone else’s words of wisdom can give you some new ideas. Reading can also help you relax and recharge your mental batteries.
Listen to your heart. What is it trying to tell you about where you are and what you are attempting to do? Perhaps there is a missing piece that will help you solve the puzzle.
We all get stuck in our thoughts and actions from time to time. The key is not to let it continue any longer than necessary. The sooner you can free your thoughts, the better you will feel.
We all feel stuck at one time or another--in a bad relationship, in the wrong job, in business, or just generally in life. Whatever the situation, feeling stuck doesn't make us feel good about ourselves. We may lose track of it when we don't feel good about ourselves, but we always have choices. We have the choice to change things and do something about whatever isn't working.Here are some thoughts to help you through the most frequently experienced forms of feeling stuck:
1. When you're stuck in your thinking...
Treat it as a sign that it's time to make a significant change. Growth and change can be painful, but nothing is as painful as staying stuck.
2. When you're stuck in your skills...
It's never too late to update and upgrade your knowledge and skills. And there's no better way to take a proactive approach to self-advancement. Invest in yourself and look for opportunities for development, personally and professionally. Do everything you can to learn, grow, and expand--there's always something new to learn.
3. When you're stuck thinking things should be easier...
We all want life, success, and good relationships to come easily--even though we know that's almost never the case. Instead of wondering why things come with difficulty, focus on the lessons you can learn along the way. Nothing worthwhile comes without a struggle, and there's much more wisdom to be gained in adversity than in ease.
4. When you're stuck in your actions...
Action by its definition is movement, and being stuck is the lack of movement, so it's more accurate to say you're stuck in inaction. Procrastination and passivity never work. Get up and do something--even the smallest action leads to progress.
5. When you're stuck outside your comfort zone...
When feel yourself moving out of your comfort zone, you'll gain the most if you can learn to stay at the edge between comfort and discomfort until you get past what you are going through. As I tell my clients, at the edge of your discomfort zone you will find your greatness. Be patient with yourself and remember that every failure has a lesson and every mistake is a teaching moment.
6. When you're stuck relying on others for success...
Stop. We rely on others for many things, but relying on others to make you successful is a complete waste of time. The only person who can make you successful is you. Even when we benefit from the good will of others, the action--and the achievement--has to start with us.
7. When you're stuck making excuses...
Excuses change nothing. When you're good at making excuses, it's hard to excel at anything else. Ninety-nine percent of failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses. No more excuses--it's time to change, so remember how capable you are.
8. When you're stuck in fear...
Fear can be good when it keeps you alert as you're walking past an alley at night or prompts you to check your locks before bed. But it can be destructive when it stands between you and your goals. Fear defeats more people than anything else. Don't let it keep you from what you want or use it as an excuse to come to a standstill. Instead, make it an impetus to step up and strike.
9. When you're stuck in what others think of you...
You're not in charge of what anyone else says or how they feel about your choices. If you find yourself constantly trying to prove your worth to someone else, you're losing the fight. Your success doesn't lie in what others think of you; it exists within you, in what you think about yourself. Find yourself, create your own life, and do everything you can to live it fully.
10. When you're stuck in the past...
It's impossible to have a good day today if you're still thinking and worrying about yesterday. Whatever you've encountered or experienced in the past doesn't matter. Learn from it and move on--it's a new day.
The choice between remaining stuck or moving forward will always be yours. Feeling stuck is a mindset that can prevent you from taking action and paralyze you from moving forward. Switch it up and choose yourself by supporting yourself in taking small steps toward what you want to achieve.
There are many times in our lives when we begin to feel a little stuck, like we are not moving forward as we should.
Sometimes it is just a momentary pause on the journey, and all that is needed is a little time, a little renewal, perhaps a shift in perspective, perhaps some additional know how - and with a little encouragement the energy shifts and you are back on track.
However, for many people there are some predictable and much deeper places where the sense of "stuckness" is more powerful and pervasive. In these darker places the traditional remedies simply do not work. Anyone who is there or has been there recognizes the symptoms:
There is a sense of an impasse, a feeling that you may have lost your way.
There is a sense that you are not fulfilling some intuited potential, not living the life you were meant to live.
The old ways of doing things (keeping busy, working harder) no longer remedy the problem.
Old sources of motivation and satisfaction have lost their magic.
There is a genuine longing to live a more authentic and meaningful life.
There is a growing desire to connect with what is truly important to you and more fully express your unique gifts.
These are all symptoms of a classic stage in the life journey that has been written about for millennium in myth, literature and the wisdom traditions.
Students of myth might recognize this place as the "principal ordeal" in the Hero's Journey. Developmental psychologists might recognize that a process of adaptive change (change that can only be brought about by growth) is called for. The yogis call this experience samvega, as it marks the realization of a deeply seated desire to grow, evolve and reach an entirely more fulfilling state of being.
If you find yourself at this place, here are some pointers to guide you:
First, forget turning back. You have little chance of going back to anything that used to satisfy you. You must move forward.
Secondly forget trying your old bag of tricks. Your habitual thinking and problem solving techniques do not work here. (As Einstein said, "your biggest problems are never solved at the same level of thinking that gave rise to them.")
Thirdly, the solution is not "out there" in some new set of external circumstances - new car, new relationship, etc. Rather, the solution requires an internal change. You simply cannot get out of this place being the same person you have been up to now.
If you find yourself in a place like this, get some time alone and begin the process of exploring what it is that you are attached to, what it is time to let go of, and what growth is waiting to happen? The sooner you embrace the changes you are bumping up against, and tap into the new you waiting to be born, the sooner you will feel the shift.
Finally, if at all possible, get some help with this process.
Chances are you might not recognize the changes that are staring you in the face. Spend some time with those people in your life that you can turn to at times like this. (Wise friends who know you well, insightful colleagues who will tell you the truth, a coach or mentor who can point you in the right direction. Or, if you are lucky enough to know someone experienced in these matters, a teacher or guru who can help you navigate through the many tricky and unseen reefs in the voyage to a more authentic self.)
What appears like death to the caterpillar, looks like an exciting new life to the butterfly. On the other side of these changes are some wide open blue skies.
Steve Mitten CPCC, MCC, 2005 ICF President, 2007 Canadian Coach of the Year, works with
leaders, entrepreneurs and independent professionals around the world. He is passionate about what accelerates the growth of human awareness, compassion and effectiveness.
"What To Do When You Are Stuck"If you find yourself at this place,There are many times in our lives when we begin to feel a little stuck, like we are not moving forward as we should. Here is some solid advice to help you navigate through these challenging times.Wise friends who know you well, insightful colleagues who will tell you the truth,
What appears like death to the caterpillar, looks like an exciting new life to the butterfly. On the other side of these changes are some wide open blue skies. If you find yourself in a place like this, get some time alone,The solution requires an internal change.You must keep on
moving forward.forget turning back. a process of adaptive change (change that can only be brought about by growth)the realization of a deeply seated desire to grow, These are all symptoms of a classic stage in the life journey,a feeling that you may have lost your way.is much more powerful and pervasive.
Anyone who is there or has been there recognizes the symptoms.Sometimes it is just a momentary pause on the journey, and all that is needed is a little time-out,a little renewal, perhaps a shift in perspective, perhaps some additional know how - and with a little encouragement and shifts and you are back on track.
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